The Manipulative Mindset

The Manipulative Mindset

We come across many types of people in our daily lives, but ones who think he/she can manipulate are the ones who really put my boxers in a big ole bunch. They think you’re stupid, and can get you do most anything they want. Many times they are successful when making a weak minded person think & feel a certain kind way of just about anything. They might even get a person do things they are not aware of. Like getting invite to tag along when friend is shopping with a promise for lunch or something. The entire time you in the store they buy nothing but when you get back to where ever you came from you find they boosted items, and made you an unwilling participant in a crime. (Guilty by Association)

The Manipulative mindset are those who I feel evil & hateful people! They seem to enjoy

causing heart ache, pain, and misfortune. It’s not a good look but is this not the mindset of a society who says “Get what you can anyway you can?” Those people take that idea way too literal, and almost feel like they have license to do this.

I am not sure which disappoints me more the manipulator or the manipulatee. The manipulator for manipulating or the manipultee for falling victim when most times than not they know their being manipulated & choose to allow it to happen.

People have minds of their own & sometimes make the conscience choose to not use it while other uses their mind for nothing positive. Are there any positive people left in the world? I am sure there is but it’s like trying to find a pacific grain of sand on a beach. The search in my opinion is a continuous one; a tedious one. Sometime it’s hard to see the good ones & hard to see the bad ones as well.  The good does not stand out because they are not trying to attractive forces that are negative & would take advantage of their kindness for weakness.  The negative, bad, manipulative ones know what they’re doing when they’re doing it & how they’re doing it.

At this point in my life & seem to want to steer clear of both the manipulator, and the weak minded people. Try to find a medium between the two! I know this might be a tall order and I never seem to find people who positive in their outlook on life who stay that way. Personalities change & what was once good might not be today & vice versa. Point is keep your eyes open from the very beginning to the very end. You never know what might fall out of the tree or when it will for that matter.

On a final note manipulation is a behavior learned from a very young age. Even before we knew how to walk and talk we learned how to get what we want. As we got older it transformed into a conscience state of mind. When we do with it, and is a choice we make based on what is best for us

BeBop

Pride network, Blog & Show

Discretion Vs. Closeted

Discretion Vs. Closeted

Is there a difference in the two? I believe there is but it’s a fine line drawn in the sands of self identity.

I have encountered all kinds in this journey we call life & have seen it all I guess. From super closeted to ultra discreet to even private. What’s the difference? 

Closeted have not yet master the joy of comfort in their own skin which leaves them at a disadvantage by hiding in shadows of life. God Help them find comfort & joy in self. The problem stems from stigmas, discrimination's fueled by hate of differences. They are in my prayers & have my support always. 

Discreet is the opposite where one is comfortable in the skin, but does not feel the need to broadcast to everyone their sexual orientation. Still another shadow bought on by those same stigmas & discrimination's.

Private seems to be the worst of the three.  Living life out in the open as str8 person and we would never know unless told for some underlining reason. When asked he may or may not tell it. It’s only on a need to know bases, and if he wants you to know he will but you will be bound to that secrecy. Yet another shadow contributed by he same stigma & discrimination's. 

Does anyone know the true feeling of freedom? Does any lives out totally in the open? Don’t all hide who we are from some & totally open about it to others? Living free & open (If there is such a thing) comes with dangers. We limit those dangers by how we represent ourselves, where go & who we know. Why is we can only be true to ourselves in boyz town, where a mask for the comfort of others?  Reduces the attention we could get by just being ourselves seems like a self contain prison if you ask me.

Life is too short to live by societies standards & it’s time we take a good look at ourselves, and learn there is nothing in life more important than breaking the chains of oppression. We need to practice living life as ourselves, and care less about what others thing or feel about the way we life. At the end of the day is those who oppose you pay for you? No! So why care about what other say, think & feel. 

I can sympathize with those that are afraid & fear seems to be our biggest barrier to self freedom, but some point we have to take stand & fight in some way for what we know is right.

I live life out in the open but still feel like I am in a contain prison not of my own making! If I can’t be who I am when ever & where ever I choose then life is only worth living for the fight for a better day. I have been fight most of my life to break free, but one huddle after another is thrown in my way, and I jump over them just to have more put in my way. Do I stop the good fight? No I refine my efforts & try again. 

It’s easy to let other fight on the front line for a better day while others hide in the shadows of guilt & shame. It takes real balls to join the fight & make it happen instead of waiting while other take the lumps, bumps & bruises to free our community & then run in & reap the benefits.

Join Me! 

 BeBop

The Narcissistic Personality

The Narcissistic Personality 

Have you ever met a person that is so into themselves they leave little room for you to be into them? Are you one of those people who are so wrapped up in yourself people is turned off by you? I meet people like this all the time & find it so funny they complain about not having anyone romantically in their lives, and everyone is to blame except the one who needs to take ownership of it. I ask them have you looked within yourself for the answer to that problem? They say it’s not me it’s others! As if they are perfect, and need no improvement on any level. I finally say if that is what you think then you will continue to experience the same problem. Think outside the box & take a personal inventory of yourself; attitude included. There is nothing wrong with liking yourself, but if you have to stop at every mirror to admire yourself then you have a serious problem. How do you fix that problem? Only the one with the problem can answer that question.  If all you see is yourself then it’s impossible for you to see what’s beautiful around you. Conceited, self absorbed, self serving, and selfish these are the behaviors and traits of a narcissistic personality. Time to get a clue & the clue is not you! Time to take your head out of your azz! Give yourself a fair shot at happiness. Trust me you will glad you did!

BeBop

Pride Net, Blog & Show

Alone In The World

Sunday Inspirational Mini Blog: 

 (Alone in the world) 

Have you ever felt so alone in the world you felt life was no longer worth living? Have you ever ask your God Why am I still here? When will be my time or when will you come for me? I have asked that question so many times over the course of my life and even more these days. I mean when you have no one in your life to truly love you, your job sucks, you have no lover/partner, Distanced from family, you’re not comfortable in your home, no real true to life friends (Cyber not included), You’re dislike or even hated for reasons which you don’t know, health that is failing. You’re discriminated against and stigmatized. Sometimes I think I’ve been placed on this earth just suffer and never to know what it is to be truly happy. What is God’s Divine plan? I’m only going to keep telling myself it my faith that better days lie ahead that keeps me going. I won’t give up! I will continue to help others, continue my search for a lifelong companion, and never stop loving my family even though that love is rarely returned. Find a better job; make your house your home. Pray for a better day!

BeBop

I survived

I survived

I was only 6 yrs old, and did not know or understand what you were doing to me!

You are my older brother who was suppose teach me, protect me, and help me grow into a man.

That Easter Sunday in 1972 is a day that will always stay planted firmly in my mind. That was the day you started your path of destruction of my life.

I survived!

When you violated my person in the many ways you did I cried out for you to stop. I cried out for help, but help did not come until after the damage was already done.

I survived!

You entered me with using Revlon Perm did you not know the active ingredient was lye an acid? The scars soon healed both inside & out, but it is the scars on my mind that will always remain planted in my brain for the rest of my life.

Still I survived!

The glass you forced into my pockets & pushed me down on cut my thigh & hurt like hell& 12 stitches to close, and a tetanus shot is what I got along with the memory of how cruel you were to your little brother.

 I was meant to survive!

Remember mommy’s boyfriend an officer of the law how’s gun you found while snooping through his draws. You put it to my head & pulled the trigger. Thanks God it was not loaded, and the bullets nowhere to be found.

God’s made me survived!

You tried to smother me with a pillows, bashed my head in with so many items I can’t even count. Drown me, burnt me & ever poison me. 

Yet I survived!

You even had the nerve to pull down your pant & defecate on my leg. You made matters worse by finger feeding it to me. To this day I still taste your shit in my mind. 

But guess what? I survived!

That line of bleach & ammonia you poured on the floor, as you stood by the door holding two butchers knives forcing an asthmatic to breathe the gases. For many months after I coughed and could taste the gases as my lungs continued to burn. The memory in my still burns my lungs.

My brother I survived!

For 10 long years I cried, cried, and cried some more. Please don’t! I promise to be a good boy, and do as you demand. Please, please, please stop it! I don’t want to hurt any more.

I really survived

Help me, help me somebody please help me. Why has my cries gone unheard? I cry as I toke yet another trip to the emergency room. Mother why do you not see what your son was doing to me? Mother, mommy I know you are not to blame. You had to work but how else could a single mother provide for her two growing boys in the absence of a traditional family unit.

I had to survive

The sudden touch a man’s hand makes me tremble with dis-ease, trust a foreign concept to comprehend. A relationship with another human being seems out of the question. Yet I try, try, and try again.

I continue to survive

 My life has been a trip for which there is no quick or easy fix. The process is long, and many times I didn’t wish to go on, but I hold on with the support of professional strangers hoping for a brighter day.

I will survive to see that brighter day!

I was messed up in the head or is it you who is more a mess in your brain? I’ve had more men come in and out of my life I seemed to have lost count, but it is you who is on your 3^rd failed marriage & working on the 4^th.

I guess you will survive!

I reached out to find out why you hated me so much, and all you’ve ever hinted at with no apology, nor a hint of remorse was simply you were born & mothers fault.

You wanted me dead, but God would not let you have your way. I’m here, and here I will stay. God had a bigger plan, a better plan. A plan full of hopes, achievements, and a mission for me to remain! Remain to help others survive the same pain.

Job well done because if not for you there could be no me helping others and with each other’s support We help one another to survive!

It won’t be an easy road but we will Shine, and thrive, because we survived!

BeBOP

God Made Me This Way

God Made Me This Way

Carl Bean recorded a record long ago titled “I was Born This Way” I believe this to be true in most cases but not in mine. I might not think I was born Gay but truly believe I am a creation of God’s making. I have met so many people over the years, and during the getting to know each other processes the question always comes up whether the other was born Gay or was it an acquired choice. Regardless to this age old question the fact is God made us this way.

This world is filled of hatred, bigotry, with a lack of acceptance, and tolerance. Even the Churches of God refused to believe God made us this way. Where it pertains to the churches one can almost say people who hate Gays must also hate God or his choices for making us Gay. I don’t believe God has made any mistake in his choices of our sexuality, and the problem again is with the people who run the church. These people make judgments based on their beliefs which are reflective of the man above.

I have been shunned for this statement in the past and I will be shunned by it in the future. I have always said to those biblical types the bible is manmade, man written, and man interpreted. Not one I have made this statement to have ever seen, talked to, and heard from his/her mouth the homosexuality is an abomination. Truth be told my God is a loving, understanding, accepting, and a tolerate God, and when they hear directly from his/her mouth that Gay is a sin, and all who engage in these behaviors will be condemned to the depths of hell for all eternity I will be believe it. Until then please, please, please shut your pie hole.

I get tired of hearing how my life is wrong, and it is against God, and this is always coming from people who have not met him. Walk into the light, and return from the light with the proof you preach. The true abominations is in the hatred, lack of tolerance & acceptance displayed by those who seem to think they what is right for all according to the word of God. What’s right for you might not be right for me & what’s right for me might not be what’s right for you. Why can’t we agree to disagree, or do you think it is God’s will to have you commit acts of violence on another group of people because you believe he is saying that way of life is wrong & those who engage in this behavior should be punished, beaten, or put to death. Sad that many people from many different cultures seem to think so. Was that the will of God or is this your excuse to act in an ungodly way? Whoever said God is my judge, and vengeance is in the hands of the lord. That person was right! He was right on all accounts that he/she will pass judgment. I have also heard it said many times that God made Adam & Eve not Adam and Steve or Eve & Jeanine. It was also said to own thane self be true. Who said all of these things? God! Maybe he did but maybe he didn’t. I know I have heard all of these phrases come from the mouth of man, and last I check Man was no God.

My belief in God might differ from your but at the end of the day we all have to follow the law, and the law only frowns on Homosexual behavior, and it is not against the law then we are free to live an alternative life as we see fit to live it. This is life without persecution, and without harm. For those who free to break the law you will pay the consequences in life or even in death. You choose you after life! One of heaven or will it be one of hell. The choice truly is yours.

Remember God Made Us This Way!

BeBop

Pride Network, Blog & Show